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The importance of clean underwear - (7/31/2018)

By Dr. Ron Gasbarro 

Mrs. Thomas came into the pharmacy and asked where the anti-fungal creams were. “My Freddy has a terrible rash between his legs.” The pharmacist directed her to the correct aisle. When she came back to the counter to pay for the cream, the pharmacist asked her what caused the rash. Was she using a new detergent? Was it an allergic reaction to something else? “Oh no,” she exclaimed. “He thinks it’s cool to go commando – you know, not wear any underwear, and just put on the same jeans day after day.” 

The pharmacist knew what Mrs. Thomas meant. The latest fad is for young males not to have on underwear. And it is a trend that can cause some medical problems. There is a reason why God invented Fruit-of-the-Looms – to keep the areas south of the belt clean and dry. Letting your “boys” hang loose may feel unyoked and liberated, but there are some valid reasons to wear underwear anyway.  

Every time you leave the house sans undies, you have a greater risk of painful crotch chafing. The fabric of your pants could be abrasive to your groin. Such clothes are not designed to be particularly kind to this sensitive body part, unlike softer underwear. Crotch rot, also called tinea cruris, is a fungal infection caused by wearing tight clothes. Clean underwear reduces the risk of crotch rot. Your BVDs absorb sweat efficiently, unlike pants, jeans, and shorts, keeping your package dry. 

Many things are going on down there and sweat is only one of them. You have heard the phrase – oft scribbled on restroom walls – “No matter how much you shake your peg, the last few drops go down your leg.” Nothing is more embarrassing than returning from the men’s room into a business meeting (where everyone is eye-level to your trousers) with a giant pee stain front and center. And your willy is not the only thing that leaks. So can your butt. It is called accidental bowel leakage (ABL). Incontinence, old age, and 5-alarm chili can cause ABL. The discharge will show if you go commando, so to save yourself from either of these humiliating accidents, always wear underwear. And guys, do not overlook your zipper. Forgetting to zip up post-potty while freeballing may give the public an accidental eyeful. One that could be potentially felonious. And, heaven forbid, you catch any part of your naked junk on the metal teeth of your fly. 10 out of 10 agony!

Advantages of going commando do exist. Normal sperm production depends on a testicular temperature below body temperature. Tight underwear creates a greenhouse effect in your pants that hampers the production of sperm. If you are in a baby-making mood, then no underwear might aid in that respect. Avoid choking tighty-whiteys and opt for roomy cotton boxers. They will give you the protection you need without the nut-cracking restriction and will keep the entire area kissing-sweet. 

Going commando can be very hip, but like everything else, there is a time and a place. Commando is great if you are going for a sexy evening with a predictable outcome. However, twisting the night away first is going to have a sweaty conclusion, which is not ideal. In addition, light linen trousers or shorts are going to unmask a little too much of your genital profile. If you go commando, wear something that makes your underwear status your little secret revealed by choice, not visual impact.

Mrs. Thomas had other ideas for her 16-year old. “He will wear underpants if I have to staple them to his skin!” And with that, she paid the pharmacist for her purchase and headed to the men’s clothing store. 

Ron Gasbarro, PharmD, is a registered pharmacist, medical writer, and principal at Rx-Press.com. Read more at www.rx-press.com  


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